Assisted Reproductive Technology is amazing – truly amazing – and has helped millions of people across the globe achieve their dreams of parenthood. The consultants, nurses, and embryologists are our living guardian angels, and we thank them dearly for everything they are doing for us
But there is just one little thing we wanted to pick up on…. the scientific language that can sometimes be a little, well, “insensitive”, shall we say?
Today, we want to focus on the language used for the egg donation process.
Egg donation is a deeply personal and emotionally-charged process for all parties involved, including the future parents, the egg donors, and any children resulting from the donation.
For this reason, the language used in discussions about egg donation (as well as other aspects of assisted reproductive technologies) should always be respectful, sensitive, and compassionate. But sadly, this isn’t always the case.
We turned to our readers who have been through the egg donation process and asked them the question: “Is there language, words or titles that you find insensitive?”
Here are some of the responses:
“Someone once referred to the donor as the “actual mum’!”
“Referring to donors as parents”
“Donor mum!”
“Basically, you’re the surrogate.”
“I don’t actually like the title ‘intended parent’. I am the parent. That’s all I need to be referred to as.”
“I just want there to be more sensitivity to mothers of donor-conceived children. I don’t like being referred to as a donor-egg mum. I am a mum. End of’.
We do understand that the experts are straight-talking to avoid any ambiguity and to ensure that no mistakes are made, but it is crucial for medical professionals, fertility clinics, and anyone involved in discussions about egg donation to be aware of the impact of their language on future parents and egg donors. Insensitive language can be hurtful, stigmatising, and dismissive of the complex emotions experienced by individuals seeking or providing reproductive assistance.
We turned to the team at Ovobank and asked them how they foster a more supportive and empathetic environment with their patients and donors, by following these guidelines:
- Use neutral and inclusive language: Avoid using terms that may unintentionally discriminate against or offend individuals or couples seeking egg donation. Be mindful of the diversity of families and use language that is inclusive of all family structures.
- Respect the emotions involved: Acknowledge that egg donation is a significant decision for future parents and egg donors alike. Recognise the emotional complexities and challenges faced by everyone involved.
- Provide counselling and support: Offer counselling services and support to patients and egg donors throughout the process to address their emotional needs and concerns.
- Educate and raise awareness: Promote awareness and education about egg donation and the experiences of those involved to reduce stigma and misconceptions.
- Maintain confidentiality: Respect the privacy and confidentiality of all parties involved, including their decision to disclose or not disclose their participation in egg donation.
- Be compassionate and empathetic: Show compassion and empathy towards future parents and egg donors, recognising the unique struggles and triumphs they may encounter during their journey.
Language plays a crucial role in shaping perceptions and attitudes, and using sensitive, respectful language can contribute to a more supportive and understanding environment for everyone involved in the egg donation process. It is essential for healthcare professionals, support staff, and society as a whole, to be conscious of the impact of their words and actions and strive to create a caring and compassionate space for those involved in the fertility journey.
Have you experienced language or titles that made you feel uncomfortable whilst going through the egg donation process? If you would like to share your story, drop us a line at mystory@ivfbabble.com.
Learn more about the egg donation process: