Navigating Fertility Preservation: A Personal Journey of Regret, Resilience, and Hope


Amidst the growing global trend of egg freezing, a brave and determined woman graciously opens up to share her personal journey

In my late twenties, I worked for a major tech corporation that offered fertility preservation as a benefit for all eligible employees. At the time, I was single, dating, and working as a performer and arts educator. Family planning wasn’t a priority for me, as I believed it was a decision to be made with a serious partner. However, as time went on, I began to regret not taking advantage of this valuable benefit.

Reproductive education often focuses on contraception and preventing pregnancy, leaving little emphasis on protecting reproductive rights and the possibility of conceiving. Many young people, especially those who can become pregnant, are uninformed about this important aspect of health education and family planning. If I had been educated and emotionally prepared for the circumstances, I might not have missed out on such a life-changing perk.

After four and a half years with the tech company, I was offered a unique opportunity to tour Japan as a soloist with a symphonic concert. Knowing the transient nature of the performing arts industry, I left the tech job to pursue my career. During the tour, someone asked me what I planned to do afterward. I mentioned that my tech company would help pay to freeze my eggs if I returned, but I questioned whether that was a sufficient reason to go back.

In 2018, I did not return to the tech job and focused on performing, teaching, and entrepreneurship. I met someone special, but the relationship didn’t work out, and family planning still wasn’t a priority for me. However, in the summer of 2020, during the height of the COVID pandemic, that person re-entered my life. We reconnected unexpectedly, but the relationship ended traumatically when I discovered he was married.

This heartbreak led me to reflect on my life and career

As the world began to reopen, I rebuilt my life with thoughts of motherhood in mind. I spoke to friends and women who had undergone or were undergoing IVF. Preliminary research and a blood test indicated that my egg count was in the lower-middle range for someone my age. This prompted me to consider fertility preservation, but without employer coverage, the cost was over $20,000. However, with the support of my parents, we agreed to split the expense.

I went to a highly recommended fertility clinic and committed to the process, despite knowing that my insurance wouldn’t cover the procedure, medication, or cryogenic storage. However, several emotional curveballs, including my sister’s breast cancer diagnosis, delayed my timeline. In 2022, I finally returned to my fertility preservation plan.

The process involved regular blood tests, ultrasounds, and self-administered hormone injections. I overcame my fear of needles with the support of a friend who was simultaneously doing IVF. However, I faced frustrations with the pharmacy, pharmaceutical company, and insurance. Timing the dosage was crucial, and there was often guesswork involved. I spent hours negotiating with insurance agents and went through an eight-month appeals process. Eventually, I received partial reimbursement through grants and assistance from organizations.

Despite the challenges, I successfully completed two cycles of fertility preservation, resulting in 20 frozen eggs. I call them “myrtles,†and they will be available to me in the future if needed. When the time comes, I hope to try getting pregnant naturally first, with a doctor estimating an 85 percent chance of having at least one child and a 50 percent chance of two.

Fertility preservation is a significant financial and emotional commitment. As someone who froze my eggs at 36, has never been pregnant, and is still searching for the right partner, I hope my story can inspire and encourage others considering the process.

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