Overcoming the “January blues” is a challenge for many, marked by feelings of low mood or sadness due to post-holiday letdown, cold weather, lack of sunlight, and the return to normal routines. However, for those grappling with infertility and the pressure to support fertility, preparing for IVF, and struggling to conceive, the emotional toll can be especially profound
We spoke with Caroline Spencer, the Lead Counsellor at The Lister Fertility Clinic, and asked her to help us “ease” into the new year with the help of some of her coping strategies.
To begin, lets first look at why the January Blues can weigh so heavy for someone struggling with infertility….
New Beginnings Pressure
The start of a new year is often associated with resolutions and new beginnings. For individuals or couples struggling with infertility, the pressure to conceive and the desire for a fresh start may contribute to heightened emotions. With yet another year passing, and a new one starting, the awareness of time can heighten anxiety.
Reflection on Goals
The beginning of a new year can prompt reflection on life goals, including the desire to start or expand a family. For those facing fertility issues, this reflection may bring about feelings of frustration or disappointment, and possible fear that the same “failures” may happen again.
Social Comparisons
Social events and gatherings during the holiday season may have involved family discussions and celebrations, making individuals dealing with infertility more aware of their challenges. This awareness can contribute to a sense of isolation or sadness.
Treatment Cycles
Some individuals undergoing fertility treatments may have treatment cycles that coincide with the start of the year. The stress of treatment, coupled with the uncertainty of outcomes, can contribute to emotional distress.
Lifestyle Changes
Resolutions related to health and lifestyle changes, common in January, may be particularly relevant for individuals hoping to optimise fertility. The pressure to make these changes can add to the emotional burden.
So what can you do to ease the emotional weight?
Seeking Support
Open communication with a partner, friends, family, or support groups can provide emotional support. The online TTC community is also a wonderful space where you can reach out and lean on people who understand how you are feeling. Speaking to those who “get it” will ease the feeling of isolation. You can find friends on instagram, and IVF forums, such as the private Facebook IVF support groups.
Professional Help
Consider seeking the guidance of mental health professionals specialising in fertility-related issues. Professional counsellors or coaches will listen and guide you wherever you are in your TTC journey.
Self-Care
Prioritise self-care activities that promote emotional well-being, such as exercise, relaxation techniques, and hobbies. Rather than focus negatively on the parts of your reproductive body that don’t function like you need them to, focus on what you do love about your body.
Setting Realistic Goals
Establish realistic goals and expectations regarding fertility treatments and outcomes and take each step of the process at a time.
Mindfulness and Stress Reduction
Practices like mindfulness, meditation, and stress reduction techniques can be really beneficial. Focusing on the moment can stop your mind spiralling into the future.
Balancing Expectations
Recognise that feelings of sadness or frustration are normal, but it’s essential to balance them with hope and optimism for the future.
If the emotional impact of infertility becomes overwhelming, seeking professional support from a therapist or counsellor who specialises in reproductive health can be beneficial. Remember that everyone’s journey is unique, and finding coping mechanisms that work for you is an important part of the process.
Remember to take small steps and try not to look too far forward. If you find yourself struggling and need some support from me, you can reach me at The Lister Fertility Clinic.
Related content that you might find useful:
Looking after your emotional wellbeing during IVF and how counselling can help
